Take as many tablets as you need.

Mr Mustard has been trying to find out how many tablets, or laptops, have been lost, stolen or not returned.

He has been told that since 1 January 2010 just two have been lost. Perhaps they got dropped and flushed down the loo ? or left on a train more likely.

Since 1 January 2010 ten have been stolen. Mr Mustard is sure that they were all properly encrypted but he might just have to ask another question about that. 

It is impossible to tell him how many have not been returned by departing contractors as this is controlled by 462 separate managers. A perfect system in Barnet Council. What if every manager failed to account for one each, and their manager is hardly likely to notice as they have their head in the One Barnet cloud, then 462 systems not returned at £1,500 a pop would be £693,000. Ooh look Mr Mustard is sending an email to the Head of Audit suggesting some work that might be worthwhile.

Mr Mustard thought that as The use of tablets/laptops or any IT equipment at Barnet is strictly monitored he should see the document that contractors borrowing council laptops and tablets have to sign in blood ( Mr Mustard made the last two words up ) to return the said equipment when they leave. Here is what he was sent:-

click & click again to enlarge then back to return

Do you have any devises in your home. No, not in Mr Mustard's either. Who are these illiterates that Barnet employ by the dozen?

Mr Mustard will now send for the three policies and one procedure that are mentioned. 

What is not mentioned?

I will keep the equipment safe from loss and thieves ( and not leave it in the pub on a Friday lunchtime )

I will return it when I leave. ( Doh! )

Yours frugally

Mr Mustard